Posted by: Sam Olsen | January 13, 2012

The Chronicles of Larry 18: ready to fly

So we’re packed, ready to go. Leavin’, on a jet plane, to South Africa and the UK. Hope though the journey doesn’t end like John Denver‘s last one. Crashin’ in a jet plane doesn’t have the same ring.

Holidays rule. I just need to get through the inconvenience of school and Dad’s birthday first.

You may have gathered it’s Chinese New Year soon. School decides it’s a great idea to make us all dress up in Chinese costumes. Mum of course thinks this a great idea. So I get dressed up in a red costume bought from a street stall downtown. Doesn’t degrade me at all. Not even when Mr Ed the teacher bursts out laughing when I walk in to class. “A mini Jackie Chan!” he chortles. I’m tempted to try some of Jackie’s moves, I can tell you.

Now I’m lying on the sofa drinking my morning milk; Mum comes in and picks me up (without asking permission, of course. So polite). Next thing I’m lying in a pile of cards and parcels on Their bed. “It’s Daddy’s birthday today Lawrence” says Mum. Duh, I know, I wrapped his present yesterday. Must be the booze making her memory go. So sad.

Dad opens a card, but can’t quite manage to finish taking it out, the weakling. He gives me the card and I yank it from the envelope. Not so hard, was it? But he only has one card worth having, the one signed by me. I wrote LAW in crayons: subliminal you see, to make sure he knows I’m boss round here.

Granny gives him a t-shirt saying “Surrey seems to be the hardest word”. Geographical humour not an obvious choice.

Dad looks happy with his haul. All he needs to now is a day off. Ha ha. Next year will be a bit of a shock for sure.

So: all our bags are packed and we’re ready to go. They’re standing outside my door. They think I’m asleep. I’m clearly not, because the taxi is waiting outside the block, tooting his horn like a doofus. (I mean, come on, we booked it because we need to go to the airport, so we’re not likely to just forget about it, are we?) But soon I’ll be in my seat, swigging my milk, watching a movie and being chatted up by the stewardesses. Ah, the good life. Cape Town and London here I come. And no school or birthdays in sight.



  1. Happy and safe travels guys x x x x

    • Thanks xx

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